Skip to Content
800-533-8762
  • Careers
  • Newsroom
  • Health Care Professionals
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
UPMC
  • Find a Doctor
  • Services
    • Frequently Searched Services
    • Frequently Searched Services
      Allergy & Immunology Behavioral & Mental Health Cancer Ear, Nose & Throat Endocrinology Gastroenterology Heart & Vascular Imaging Neurosciences Orthopaedics
      Physical Rehabilitation Plastic & Reconstructive Surgery Primary Care Senior Services Sports Medicine Telemedicine Transplant Surgery Walk-In Care Weight Management Women’s Health
      See all Services
    • Services by Region
    • Find a UPMC health care facility close to you quickly by browsing by region.
      UPMC in Western Pa. Western Pa. and New York
      UPMC in Central Pa. Central Pa.
      UPMC in North Central Pa. North Central Pa.
      UPMC in Western Md. Maryland & West Virginia
    • See All Services
  • Locations
    • Locations by Type
    • Locations by Type
      UPMC hospitals
      Hospitals
      Physical Therapy
      Physical Therapy
      Urgent care
      Walk-In Care
      UPMC Outpatient Centers
      Outpatient Centers
      UPMC Imaging Services
      Imaging
      Community Health Centers
      Community Health Centers
      See All Locations
    • Locations by Region
    • Locations by Region
      UPMC in Southwest Pa. Southwest Pa.
      UPMC in North Central Pa. North Central Pa.
      UPMC in Northwest Pa and Ny. Northwest Pa. & Western N.Y.
      UPMC in West Central Pa. West Central Pa.
      UPMC in Central Pa. Central Pa.
      UPMC in Western Md. Maryland & West Virginia
    • See All Locations
  • Patients & Visitors
    • Patient & Visitor Resources
    • Patient & Visitor Resources
      Patients and Visitors Resources Pay a Bill Classes & Events Medical Records Health Library Patient Information
      Patient Portals Privacy Information Shared Decision Making Traveling Patients Visitor Information
      Man uses mobile phone
      Pay a Bill
      Nurse reviews medical chart
      Request Medical Records
  • Patient Portals
  • Find Covid-19 updates
  • Schedule an appointment
  • Request medical records
  • Pay a bill
  • Learn about financial assistance
  • Find classes & events
  • Send a patient an eCard
  • Make a donation
  • Volunteer
  • Read HealthBeat blog
  • Explore UPMC Careers
Skip to Content
UPMC
  • Patient Portals
  • For Patients & Visitors
    • Find a Doctor
    • Locations
    • Patient & Visitor Resources
    • Pay a Bill
    • Services
    • More
      • Medical Records
      • Financial Assistance
      • Classes & Events
      • HealthBeat Blog
      • Health Library
  • About UPMC
    • Why UPMC
    • Facts & Stats
    • Supply Chain Management
    • Community Commitment
    • More
      • Financials
      • Support UPMC
      • UPMC Apps
      • UPMC Enterprises
      • UPMC International
  • For Health Care Professionals
    • Physician Information
    • Resources
    • Education & Training
    • Departments
    • Credentialing
  • Careers
  • Contact Us
  • Newsroom
  • UPMC >
  • Patient and Visitor Resources >
  • Information for Patients >
  • Advance Care Planning >
  • Start the Conversation
Patient and Visitor Resources
Safe Haven Program
Patient Portals
Pre-Registration
Classes and Events
Traveling Patients
Patient Education
Food and Nutrition Services
Information for Patients
Thank A Nurse
Waitlist
Before Your Appointment, Surgery, or Procedure
During Your Stay
After Your Stay
Patient Rights and Responsibilities
Patient Forms
Resources for LGBTQ+ Patients, Caregivers
Civil Rights Grievances
Advance Care Planning
About Advance Directives
Start the Conversation
Choose a Health Care Agent
Your Values
Frequently Asked Questions
Pennsylvania Advance Health Care Directive
Resources for Faith Leaders
Patient and Family Advisory Council
Patient Relations
Disabilities Resource Center
Flu - Frequently Asked Questions
Inpatient vs. Observation Status - Frequently Asked Questions
Information for Visitors
Medical Records
Paying My Bill
Privacy Information
Shared Decision Making
Ecards
Patient and Visitor Resources
Safe Haven Program
Patient Portals
Pre-Registration
Classes and Events
Traveling Patients
Patient Education
Food and Nutrition Services
Information for Patients
Thank A Nurse
Waitlist
Before Your Appointment, Surgery, or Procedure
During Your Stay
After Your Stay
Patient Rights and Responsibilities
Patient Forms
Resources for LGBTQ+ Patients, Caregivers
Civil Rights Grievances
Advance Care Planning
About Advance Directives
Start the Conversation
Choose a Health Care Agent
Your Values
Frequently Asked Questions
Pennsylvania Advance Health Care Directive
Resources for Faith Leaders
Patient and Family Advisory Council
Patient Relations
Disabilities Resource Center
Flu - Frequently Asked Questions
Inpatient vs. Observation Status - Frequently Asked Questions
Information for Visitors
Medical Records
Paying My Bill
Privacy Information
Shared Decision Making
Ecards

Chat Keywords List

  • cancel or exit: Stops your conversation
  • start over: Restarts your current scenario
  • help: Shows what this bot can do
  • terms: Shows terms of use and privacy statement
  • feedback: Give us feedback
Continue
Chat with UPMC
RESTART
MENU
CLOSE

How to Start the Conversation About Advance Care Planning

UPMC Content 3

Thinking about getting sick can be scary.

Sometimes people think the conversation is only for when you're sick or older. And, many times, our loved ones feel uneasy talking about the subject. But having a conversation about advance care planning is very important.

Even though it's hard, the best time to talk about it is now. It's easier than waiting until you become ill.

Having the time for discussion and reflection can often help families and loved ones understand each other’s views about end of life care.

Tips for Starting the Conversation

  • Use conversation starters: articles, TV shows, movies, or current events.
  • Other triggers include sermons, funerals, and medical checkups. Even talking about the death of someone you know can help get you started.
  • Talk about your values — what makes your life worth living and what you consider quality of life.
  • Approach the conversation wanting to share your wishes before you ask someone else to share their own wishes.
  • Be prepared to have more than one conversation or that the subject may cause an emotional reaction. This is ok.

Examples of Conversation Starters

Sharing your health care wishes with someone else:

  • “I know that this isn’t easy to talk about, but if I get sick or have an accident — and can’t make medical decisions for myself — I'd like to share what would be important to me, so you could be my decision maker.”

Asking someone else their wishes:

  • “I have also been wondering what would be most important to you if you were not able to speak for yourself? Would you want the doctors to try aggressive treatments, even if they wouldn’t cure you, to give you more time? Or would you rather have doctors manage your pain or disease so you feel better but might not live as long? Would you rather be in a hospital or at home? Who would you want to be around you?”
  • “Thinking about getting sick can be scary. If this is too much to talk about right now, could you at least think about these things so that we could discuss them later?”
  • After a movie or news story: “What would you want us to do if you were in this situation?”
  • “While I was in the doctor’s office, I saw a form called the “Pennsylvania Advance Health Care Directive.” Would you be interested in reading it so we could discuss it later?”

Advance Care Planning Resources 

  • Frequently Asked Questions About Advance Directives
  • PREPARE — The PREPARE website is designed to help people and their loved ones prepare for medical decision making.
  • The Conversation Project — The Conversation Project is dedicated to helping people and their loved ones prepare for medical decision making.
  • Advance Care Planning Brochure — Learn more about starting the conversation around advance care planning.
  • Pennsylvania residents can learn more about advance care directives here.
    • Access the Pennsylvania Advance Health Care Directive Form (PDF).
  • Maryland residents can learn more and access their advance directive form here.

From our Health Library

  • Caregiver Support: Talking about Advance Care Planning

Contact Us

For more information, or to talk with someone about advance care planning, contact the UPMC Palliative and Supportive Institute at PSIcare@upmc.edu

Maryland residents can contact the UPMC Western Maryland Care Coordination/Social Work Department at 240-964-1090 or learn more on our website.

Additional Resources

  • Local and National Palliative Care Resources and Groups
  • 8 Step Advance Care Planning Guide
  • Advance Care Planning brochure (PDF)

Download the PDF about advance medical planning (link opens a new window).

For more information about advance directives, download Pennsylvania Advance Health Care Directive (PDF).

UPMC
200 Lothrop Street Pittsburgh, PA 15213

412-647-8762 800-533-8762

Patients And Visitors
  • Find a Doctor
  • Locations
  • Pay a Bill
  • Patient & Visitor Resources
  • Disabilities Resource Center
  • Services
  • Medical Records
  • No Surprises Act
  • Price Transparency
  • Financial Assistance
  • Classes & Events
  • Health Library
Health Care Professionals
  • Physician Information
  • Resources
  • Education & Training
  • Departments
  • Credentialing
Newsroom
  • Newsroom Home
  • Inside Life Changing Medicine Blog
  • News Releases
About
  • Why UPMC
  • Facts & Stats
  • Supply Chain Management
  • Community Commitment
  • Financials
  • Supporting UPMC
  • HealthBeat Blog
  • UPMC Apps
  • UPMC Enterprises
  • UPMC Health Plan
  • UPMC International
  • Nondiscrimination Policy
Life changing is...
Follow UPMC
  • Contact Us
  • Website/Email Terms of Use
  • Medical Advice Disclaimer
  • Privacy Information
  • Active Privacy Alerts
  • Sitemap
© 2025 UPMC I Affiliated with the University of Pittsburgh Schools of the Health Sciences Supplemental content provided by Healthwise, Incorporated. To learn more, visit healthwise.org
Find Care
Providers
Video Visit
Portal Login